Divorce presents a huge challenge for you as a parent, and the same applies to your ex-partner. But the both of you need to find a new way to communicate and relate to one another for the sake of your children. Co-parenting should be the aim, and even if it seems impossible right now, you can both get there if the both of you are willing to put in the time and effort. Here are some tips to help with that.
Try to Create Consistency and Understanding
First of all, you’re going to want to ensure there’s a level of consistency in the plans you put in place. Kids need structure and they need to know what to expect from one week to the next. It helps everyone, including you, if you have a consistent schedule that everything agrees to and everyone is happy with and accepts. That mutual understanding will act as an important foundation.
Set Boundaries with Each Other
It’s also important that you set boundaries and keep things clear cut in terms of what your new relationship is. Of course, the new relationship between you needs to be centred around parenting. Everything else should be decided between you. If you want to draw a line in the sand with a particular boundary, your ex should accept that, and the same applies the other way round too.
Make Room for Your Child’s Preferences as They Grow Older
If your children are getting older, there does need to be some flexibility in the schedule to allow for the things that they want to do. They’re not always going to want to either be with one parent or the other. They might have a partner or want to stay with friends. It’s important those needs don’t get lost as you and your ex try to find the right co-parenting balance.
Keep the Relationship Out of the Parenting Work
The relationship that you and your ex once had and the things that led to your divorce should always be kept out of your parenting arrangements. The best divorce solicitors should take care of the legal side of things for you so you don’t have to get involved in the divorce equivalent of hand to hand combat with your ex because that obviously doesn’t help anyone.
Acknowledge Each Other’s Concerns as They Arise
Finally, you should try to acknowledge one another’s concerns if you can. This does need to be done because if you allow your worries or problems fester, they can end up coming out and being expressed in less healthy ways later on. So try to create an arrangement where you can discuss parenting issues openly together.
With the help of the ideas above, you’ll be able to ensure you and your ex-partner parent successfully together. Of course, it’s going to be challenging and there’s no guarantee of immediate success, so keep in mind the fact that you’re both going to have to work at it.