When you become a mother, it can become all-consuming. You have a little bundle of joy that relies on your for everything from feeding and changing to keeping them safe; you’re so focused on the needs of your child that it can be easy to lose yourself in the process.
So many mums get to the point where they feel like they don’t know who they are or what they want anymore and it can take a real toll on their mental health. So, if you’re feeling this way, it may be time to rediscover who you are apart from being a mum. Here are some things that will help you with that.
Invest in self-care
If you don’t take any time out just for yourself, there is no way you are going to be able to discover who you are and what matters to you now. So, schedule regular time for self-care. Paint your nails, brush your hair, take a long soak in the bath, cook a really nutritious meal – so whatever you need to do to feel like a happy, healthy individual and don’t feel guilty about it. This is the first step to getting you back.
Maybe you’ve always wanted to retrain as an accountant, so set a goal to look into getting funding from that whether from grants and government loans to Buddy Loans and set a goal of enrolling in the next X months. Maybe you’ve always wanted to start your own baking business, so set a goal of building your own website where you can show off your bakes and start taking orders. Mauve you’ve always wanted to travel more, so look into the logistics of doing so with a family and book that first flight. If you don’t have a goal you will never move on from being just parent, which might be okay now, but what about when the kids leave?
Don’t have a goal in mind? Think about where you would like to be in 5 years, 10- years or when the kids leave the nest. This should give you a place to state, but it’s fine to take your time to explore your options before you commit to any given goal.
Go out and do something without the kids
If you want to rediscover who you are, you need to get yourself out there and start doing things without the kids. This could be things you already love like walking with friends or taking art classes, but you should also throw new and unexpected things you haven’t tried before like rock climbing, yoga or even the local WI, into the mix too., Why? Because you’ve changed and you might find that your tastes have changed too, Try everything, have fun, and you might just find yourself again on the way.
You may be a mum but you’re also an individual and embracing who you are is the only way to ensure that you are a happy. well-rounded individual, which will be good for you, and your children too because when mum is happy everyone is.